Are You Busy? The Hidden Work Behind Starting a Business

“Are you busy?” It’s a question people ask all the time. But when you’re trying to turn an idea or skill into a business, it never feels like a simple question.

Because they ask, “Are you busy?”

but what you hear is,

“Are you busy with lots of clients?”

The problem isn’t the question, it’s how you feel about your answer. Because you are busy… just not in the way you want to be.

“Got many clients yet?”

When I look back at the times I’ve started a new business, I can see the same pattern every time. The first time was after I left my corporate job. I’d left to give myself space to work out what I actually wanted to do, but I quickly signed up for a Personal Training course. Given my love of fitness, it felt like the obvious next step.

I loved the training and I was proud of myself when I qualified. But qualifying wasn’t the finish line, it was the starting point.

Until that moment, everything had been structured. I had assignments, deadlines, modules, and a clear sense of progress. And if someone asked how things were going, I always had an answer: “I’ve got an assignment due.” or “Training’s going well.”

Then the course ended, and the structure disappeared. No plan, no roadmap and no clients. Just me, my new qualification, and the open road ahead.

That’s when I realised the uncomfortable truth: nobody becomes an expert on day one.

And that’s when the doubts crept in, not about the decision to change careers, but about how long it would take before I felt like I was actually “doing it.” Because in a world where success is linked to busyness, not being busy with clients feels like you’re falling behind.

The Invisible Work People Don’t See

Nothing prepares you for the moment you realise you’ve done all the training… yet still don’t feel like you know what you’re doing.

You trained in a specialist area, but you didn’t get trained to set up a business.

You didn’t learn:

• how to make people aware you exist

• how to market yourself

• how to show up online

• how to talk confidently about what you do

And that’s only the beginning. There’s a whole world of behind-the-scenes setup that no course ever covers. Creating a logo, learning Canva, sorting out the business side, writing content, figuring out systems, setting up tools, understanding platforms. The amount you have to learn on your own is huge, and most of it is invisible to everyone else.

The Messy Middle

There’s a stage in any big change that’s often described as the messy middle. It’s that awkward middle space where you’ve outgrown the old version of yourself but haven’t stepped fully into the new one. And when you’re setting up something new, this space feels especially uncomfortable because you’re still finding your feet.

Some days you feel energised and clear. Other days you wonder what on earth you’re doing.

The impatience creeps in, you set unrealistic timelines and you start to feel like you’re not moving fast enough, like you’re falling behind, even though you’re the one who set the deadline. This is the moment where confidence dips and doubt sneaks in, the moment where everything feels slightly unsettled.

As a coach, I’ve seen this pattern with so many of my clients. They’ve come from different backgrounds, different industries and had different goals, but the same quiet wobble in the in-between stage. Not because they’re not capable, but because they haven’t lived in the new version of themselves long enough for it to feel natural.

This Is Why “Are You Busy?” Feels So Uncomfortable When You’re Starting a New Business

People are asking from the outside, but you’re living everything from the inside. They mean well, they’re just checking in and want to hear you’re okay. But you’re hearing it through the filter of your own expectations. And often, the toughest critic in the room is you. They see progress as something measurable, but you’re at a stage where most progress is invisible.

They see busyness as how many clients you have, but you see all the foundations you’re building that no one else will ever notice.

And that mismatch of their lens versus your lens is what makes a simple question feel like a test.

Slow, quiet beginnings aren’t a sign you’re doing something wrong, they’re simply the part no one talks about.

Reminding myself that it’s ok to take time really helped. We live in a world that often makes success look instant, but real progress is almost always slower, quieter and built piece by piece. You rarely see anyone sharing the quieter, behind-the-scenes work.

It also helped to remember that other people don’t need to understand your journey, or the decisions you make along the way. I’ve made choices that surprised people, but I always knew they were right for me. Often, when someone questions your move, it’s because they can’t imagine making it themselves. That doesn’t make it wrong, and sometimes their reaction says more about their fears than it does about your path.

It's often said that many newly qualified people leave within their first year, and it’s hard not to wonder whether this messy middle is part of the reason. Not lack of talent. Not lack of passion. Just a lack of awareness about how normal this uncomfortable stage actually is.

A Few Words If You’re In This Stage

If you’re in this early chapter and it feels messy or uncertain, this is completely normal. It doesn’t mean you’ve made the wrong decision or that you’re falling behind. This stage feels uncomfortable because you’re starting something new, and most of that work happens long before anyone else can see it.

You’re learning, you’re building foundations and you’re moving forward, even if it doesn’t always feel like it. Most people who ask how things are going really do mean well. They just don’t see the invisible work you’re doing, but that doesn’t take away from the progress you’re making.

You’re not behind, you’re just at the beginning, and beginnings take time.

If you’d like more real-life reflections like this, head back to the blog page to keep reading.

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